Would you catch you if you fell?
By a truly Inependent Artist
I have been thinking a lot recently about this question. Why don’t we treat ourselves the same way we treat our friends? Look at it like this: If your friend was in distress, wouldn’t you offer them compassion, kindness, love and a hug? Why is it so hard to do this for ourselves?
If you are anything like me, your inner voice is much more negative than positive “You should be better, you should look better, you should be doing more etc… all this self-directed unhappiness makes us look at the world this way. For example, if you don’t feel so great about your physical appearance, what is the first thing, you will notice in others? The way they look. If you feel insecure about certain things, the minute someone will point them out, you will probably hit back with anger, hurt, and on the defensive.
People talk a lot about self-love but what does it mean?
My first solo EP- GIVE ME LOVE was an ask that came to me after my grandmother; who had the most pure and generous heart, passed away suddenly. Having just moved to Valencia, I felt very alone and empty so I decided to embark on a journey to find the real meaning of self-love and to try to apply it. Sounds easy so far. I googled Self-love, defined as "love of self" or "regard for one's own happiness or advantage" with both being conceptualized as basic human necessity and as a moral flaw, akin to vanity and selfishness, synonymous with amour propre, conceit, conceitedness, egotism...
It sounds more on the negative side than positive. I continued my research by looking at various YouTube videos of people talking about the subject, different trials of giving yourself compliments out loud whilst looking into the mirror, all were pretty powerful. How hard can this be?
My first real encounter with self-love happened in one of my first Yoga classes in the Bahamas. I remember sitting in meditation and having the teacher saying, “you are love”. It made a big switch in my life, learning that you can’t love anyone in high frequency until you love yourself. I started practicing this mantra and every morning I would repeat to myself “I deserve to be loved” and believe me it is not as easy as it sounds. It soon brought me peace though and I stopped searching for approval from others, I focused on what and how I could give unconditional love. It had worked! I felt at peace for the first time in my life with the ability to look at anybody, a long-time friend or family member, with a fresh approach. I lifted the expectations off myself and others and started looking at everything in a different way. Now if you are not a spiritual person this might all sound a little crazy to you, but there is nothing to lose by trying it. Start by being thankful. Going to INDIA and having one of my teachers starting a class with Thank your feet, for supporting you, I never thought about that before.
Now, this is a discipline that must be practiced, define what works for you and keep going. I’m still a human, I get caught up and stressed but all those moments happen only when I stop practising Yoga, meditation, self-love and kindness to others. Every day is a chance to progress, we take so many things for granted, let’s start right there. Be kind to yourself daily, with word you tell yourself, or something brings you happiness and one kind gesture to world.
So, would you catch you if you fell? Only YOU can decide on the answer.